"What is your why?"
That's what a friend asked me last week when I told her about a challenge I was facing. A challenge that came while doing what God has called me to do. I knew when I decided to be obedient to Him that this particular calling would be inherently hard. But I saw a need, and I was excited to let God use me to meet that need.
So when my friend asked why I had decided to do what God asked of me, I was able to give her a list of reasons. There's a need. There's brokenness. God can fix it. To be honest, the biggest reason was simply that God told me to do it.
Throughout life, God is going to ask us to do many things. Some things will make sense, and others won't. Some will be easy, and some will be hard. Every time He asks, we have to choose if we will be obedient or not. (I highly, highly recommend obedience.)
In my life, I've had to learn obedience. When I have chosen to do what God says, I've normally had a reason for it. Here are a few of those reasons.
- I'm a Christian, so it's what I'm supposed to do.
- He's God, and I know I'll eventually give in anyway, so why wait?
- I haven't heard anything new from Him since I decided not to do what He said, and I'm tired of it.
- And in the last two years or so, I trust Him because I know He knows better than I do.
This week, for the first time in my life, I understood why He said that if we love Him, we'll obey Him.
You see? When my friend first asked why I was doing this specific task, the reasons I listed helped get me through the next few days. But then things got even harder. Suddenly, those reasons didn't seem good enough. Even trusting God didn't seem good enough. The trouble just didn't seem worth it anymore. Even though I knew it would be disobedient and keep me from part of His purpose for my life, I wanted to quit.
But God reminded me of the need I saw when He first asked me to do this. He reminded me that He's the one who showed me the need. He showed me, because it breaks His heart too. But unlike me, He can do something about it. He can free people. He can restore relationships. He can heal wounded bodies and broken hearts. He can bring purpose and fulfillment. If only someone will lead people to Him.
That's when I realized something. No matter how much we want to please God, no matter how much we trust that He knows best, eventually, we get tired or hurt or both (by people, not God). Those reasons to do as He says are no longer enough. But if we truly love Him, we'll stick with it. We'll stick with it because what breaks His heart, breaks our hearts as well. We'll stick with it because we want to see Him do what only He can do. We'll stick with us because we know it brings Him joy to use us.
So, what's your why? What has God called you to do and are you being obedient? If you are following Him, what's your reason? If you're not, what will it take to change your heart?
