When you were a baby, did you have food? Or did your parents have food? Did you feed yourself or did your parents feed you? Did they feed you when you were full or when it was the right time?
I'm pretty sure, that when you were a baby, your parents bought food. They shared it with you. (I mean, why else would they buy canned mush?) They fed you, and they fed you when you were hungry. You were wholly dependent on them because you couldn't earn money, you couldn't go grocery shopping, you couldn't open the can of baby food, and you couldn't lift the spoon to your mouth.
Raw dependence. I have heard that phrase over and over again this year. To be honest though, I've only just started to figure out what it means and looks like. To be even more honest, figuring it out is terrifying. You know why?
Because you learn raw dependence on God by having no other option than to depend on Him to get you through. And it is FRIGHTENING!
This is especially true in the area of finances and God's provision. I've always known God could provide. I've always known He would. I've seen Him provide for other people. I've seen Him provide for my family even. Even though I've seen Him provide for so many other people, I've never been the one in control of the finances that were running short without Him. Until last month.
What God taught me is not that He provides. What God taught me is that He wants us to depend on Him and not what He provides.
In the Old Testament, when God gave the Israelites manna, He did it on a daily basis. They were only supposed to gather what they and their family needed for the day. If they did take more than one day's worth, it went bad before the next day anyway. God wanted them to trust that He would provide from them every single day.
I'm finally starting to understand that God doesn't run on our time table. We want to have enough stored up to get us by for a year, but oftentimes, being fully dependent on God means waiting on His timing. His timing always feels like the last minute. Learning that is not fun.
Until He comes through.
He comes through, and you suddenly realize how wonderful it is to depend on Him. The more you depend on Him, the more you can see His promises come true. You see His promises come true because you're looking for them and because you're giving Him room to keep them instead of trying to help Him out.
When it looks like there's no way, God shows up and shows out. He does something that only He can do. He sends a mysterious bread-like substance on a daily basis. He sends 105 million quail just so there's meat to eat. He multiplies five loaves and two fish into enough to feed 5,000 men plus women and children with 12 baskets left over. He puts an envelope with just enough to pay your tithes and your bills on your bed.
God cares for the animals and the flowers because He made them. He made you too. You are far more valuable to Him than they are. He will never leave you nor forsake you. He will always provide at exactly the right time.
I'm excited to spend the rest of my life depending on Him and letting Him fulfill His promises in my life. Join me in this journey of faith. Ask God what His promises are for your life and watch how He brings them to pass.
